How do most men define marriage?

=> A very expensive way to get your laundry done free.

=> The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once.

=> Getting married is very much like going to a restaurant with friends. You order what you want, then when you see what the other fellow has, you wish you had ordered that.

=> At the cocktail party, one woman said to another, "Aren't you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger?" The other replied, "Yes, I am, I married the wrong man."

=> Man is incomplete until he is married. Then he is finished.

=> A little boy asked his father, "Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?" And the father replied, "I don't know son, I'm still paying."

=> Young Son: Is it true, Dad, I heard that in some parts of Africa a man doesn't know his wife until he marries her? Dad: That happens in every country, son.

=> Then there was a man who said, "I never knew what real happiness was until I got married; and then it was too late."

=> After a quarrel, a wife said to her husband, "You know, I was a fool when I married you." The husband replied, "Yes, dear, but I was in love and didn't notice."

=> A man inserted an 'ad' in the classifieds: "Wife wanted". Next day he received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing: "You can have mine."

=> When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.

=> Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence.
Second marriage is the triumph of hope over experience.

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