French Fries With What?

I had a craving for french fries one day, so I pulled up to the drive-thru of McDonalds.

Me: "I'd like a large french fries please."
Clerk: "Would you like fries with that?"
I got sort of confused at this one and told him no. He told me to pull ahead, so I did, and then he asked me why I was sitting there.

Clerk: "I thought you didn't want fries."
Me: "No, I ordered a large french fries."
Clerk: "Ok. Do you want fries with that?"
Since saying no the last time had gotten me nothing, I figured I'd better say yes this time.

He gave me two large fries.

15 Ways To Get Banned From A Store

Sex Joke: Hold the Gun

A bartender was getting ready to close for the night when a robber with a ski mask burst in and pulls a gun. He yells to the bartender, "This is a stick-up! Put all your dough in this bag!"

The scared bartender pleads, "Don’t shoot, please! I’ll do as you say!"

The robber yells, "Shut up and empty the cash register!"

The bartender says, "Okay, okay! Just don’t shoot; I have a wife and kids! I’ll do whatever you say!"

The crook takes the money then puts the gun to the bartender’s head and says, Alright, now suck my cock!"

"Anything!" cries the bartender, "Just don’t shoot!"

The bartender starts to blow the crook. As the crook gets excited, he drops the gun.

The bartender sees the gun on the floor, picks it up, hands it back to the crook and yells, "Hold the gun, damn it!" One of my friends might walk in!"

Viagra Extra Strength

A guy walks into a pharmacy and says to the pharmacist, "Listen, I have three girls coming over tonight. I've never had three girls at once, and I need something to keep me horny...keep me potent."

The pharmacist reaches under the counter, unlocks the bottom drawer and takes out a small cardboard box marked with a label "Viagra Extra Strength" and says, "Here, if you eat this, you'll go nuts for twelve hours." The guy says, "Gimme three boxes."

The next day the guy walks into the same pharmacy goes up to the pharmacist and pulls down his pants. The pharmacist looks in horror as he notices the man's jewels are black and blue, and the skin is hanging off in some places.

The man says, "Gimme a bottle of Ben Gay." The pharmacist replies, "Ben Gay? You're not going to put Ben Gay on that are you?"

The man says, "No, it's for my arms, the girls never showed up."